MuMuWu's Practice Journal

"Thanks. Should have said how generous all your involvement here is.
You've always been very supportive of yogi's individual practice journals,
and yours is a very cool community resource, imho. Thanks for sharing.
"

+1!

I was getting a LOT of this last night but I didn't really notice any blockage as such. I was lying down to go to sleep and just moving through the jhanas when there was a massive amount of activity at the 3rd eye area, a really deep pulsating feeling which shifted up to the crown but became much more subtle and wide. Focusing on it brought a sense of being "pulled out" from the crown, is this similar to what you've noticed yourself?

It's uncanny how similar our experience is at present! Hope all's good with you mate.

P.S. - I'll add a +1 for Kacchapa's comment as well.

Definitley getting the pulsing showing up at the third eye which shifts to the crown eventually. I'm not sure on the "pulled out from the crown" bit though.



All is getting better all the time

"Just went for a walk at lunch (20 minutes)

Attending to the air on the skin and distant sounds gives one a real clue as to when the focus narrows (you lose sight of these). I was trying to allow for as big of a focus (lens) as possible. Eventually I am noticing more and more of what's going on and feeling more and more present and relaxed. About halfway through the walk there is a huge difference in overall experience compared to when I departed.

The mind is so big, so present. Nothing is a problem - even the garbage looks beautiful. There is occasional chatter from the mind, but it is no problem and just settles back to whence it came. For the most part there is very little selfing happening. It is mostly just what is happening in the senses and as I said even the mind is seen as just arising and passing.

Delicious...

GO FOR A WALK!!!"

I walked from the station to work this noon (20 minutes) and now read this post of yours. It reads as if you were there with me in Brugge looking out through my eyes.
I had a very strong sense of everything out there being hardly any different than the stuff in here (inside the boundaries of my skin). Very light, fleeting and joyful changing, subtly surprising me. Some ambitious thoughts came up (regarding a project I'm working on) followed by feelings of being rushed, restlessness and impatience. But I just couldn't take it seriously and it passed as soon as it came up. VERY different than how I used to experience and react to these types of sensations in the past.
We might not get perpetual bliss out of all this meditating, but the results that do come sure are worth it.

"Definitley getting the pulsing showing up at the third eye which shifts to the crown eventually. I'm not sure on the "pulled out from the crown" bit though.



All is getting better all the time"

Damnit, you guys are in my head! (except for the pulling here too)

I'm not leaving!...

I'll change my Facebook status to "Squatting In David's Pineal Gland".....Ha!

me too

silliness through enlightenment

Enlightenment through silliness! Ya beauty!! The path is always filled with a weirdly dark comedic edge for me, it's been constant since the search began....

Yuck....

I'm almost certain I woke up in Dukkha nana territory today. It's funny how, other than a bit of irritability, these are mainly a physical phenomenon now. It really isn't conducive to work as I feel cheesed when people ask me to do things for them (which is my job). I also find the lack of ability to focus pretty difficult to deal with at work as it makes it hard to concentrate on the task at hand.

Sensations are rather harsh, mostly being felt as negative energy or pressure (with an annoying vibrating quality) in the arms and head and neck and face.

When I hit the DN it really puts the past few days in perspective. "Oh, that day when I was feeling really great with lots of bliss and vibrations was probably A&P" and "the day where I was feeling super chill was good ol dissolution"

Anyhoo, TGIF!

Also, there's some new Chinese green tea at the coffee machine here at work so that's a plus.

Check this out for a laugh

bhagavan-ramana.org/ramanateaching.html

Sri Ramana Maharshi's Teaching

played around with a technique based off the letting go approach to Jhana of the hamilton project (Nick) as well as some insight garnered from direct mode and my own practice based on some stuff I read from the Chah tradition.

The basic technique is outlined in this video:
www.dhammasukha.org/Study/Talks/stream/MN-111-ANA-100328-F.htm

What you are doing is maintaining awareness of the whole body and the fact that you are breathing (rather than maintaining a specific placement/size of awareness in relation to, say, the nosetip or the abdomen.)

While doing this one is aware of tension as it arises in the body. You are basically looking at the reaction to things as they arise in the mind or senses. Tension indicates either craving or aversion. You recognize that the mind is pulled away, you release whatever pulled the attention away, you relax the tension that is present, you re-smile ("to raise the level of mind's alertness and lighten up",), you return the attention to your object (in my case the breath and body together), and finally you repeat these steps over and over.

This is very pleasant to do, and the technique seems to really give deep insight into the process of ignorance/craving/aversion/etc.

While doing this today I got deeper and deeper as I went further and further up the arc. I was getting absorbed more and more into the 8th Jhana when BAM I was aware of a blast of light and felt as if I had just experienced a much more intense fruition than I have been having lately.

Great guided loving kindness meditation by Shinzen Young.

You checked out DIY Dharma? Some really good stuff on there, everyone from Shinzen Young to Ken Wilber. Avail yourself of some auditory delights....

I hadn't seen that site before. Thanks!

diydharma.org/

www.gnosis.org/library/7Sermons_hoeller_trans.htm

Jung's "The Seven Sermons to the Dead." An old favourite of mine.

"Hear Ye: I begin with nothing. Nothing is the same as fullness. In the endless state fullness is the same as emptiness. The Nothing is both empty and full. One may just as well state some other thing about the Nothing, namely that it is white or that it is black or that it exists or that it exists not. That which is endless and eternal has no qualities, because it has all qualities.

The Nothing, or fullness, is called by us the PLEROMA. In it thinking and being cease, because the eternal is without qualities. In it there is no one, for if anyone were, he would be differentiated from the Pleroma and would possess qualities which would distinguish him from the Pleroma."

"I speak of it in order to begin somewhere, and also to remove from you the delusion that somewhere within or without there is something absolutely firm and definite. All things which are called definite and solid are but relative, for only that which is subject to change appears definite and solid.

The created world is subject to change. It is the only thing that is solid and definite, since it has qualities. In fact, the created world is itself but a quality."

I was pretty inspired to go back to first gear practice by Daniel's new videos.

I started noting yesterday at work and it took a few hours (maybe 4 or 5) of noting itches and tension and things like that before things started really breaking up and getting more vibrational. Once I could see everything in a TV-snow like way I continued to apply attention (noting often) throughout the remainder of the day. I'm thinking I hit dissolution some time in the evening and possibly the first couple of dukkha nanas.

This morning I woke with some very aches and pains in the body and pretty intense nausea and gagging (especially in reaction to cold). I noticed the change in focus as well when driving in this morning in terms of far less tension involved in observing the periphery vs. the center of my reality.

"....pretty intense nausea and gagging "

Aye, sniffing jenkum will do that to you....Ha!

LOL - Jenkum is just an urban legend... I hope...

Update: Wow things just kicked up a notch in the crappiness department. Intense pressure in the head now, queasiness and sadness. Lots of vibrations happening - definitley seems to be chaotic. BLahrg!

LOL

Update 2: Nausea came back. I want to jump out of my skin!

"LOL - Jenkum is just an urban legend... I hope..."

I know, but it'd be even funnier if it were true. The Jenkum Method of powering through Dark Night. Ha!

The last thing one wants to do when wallowing in disgust is sniff fermented ****...
www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=jenkum

(you probably don't want to know - so don't read the link).

At around 2:00 I experienced several hard stops after spending about an hour or so in Equanimity (and reflecting on Tommy's advice to Yadid). I was really observing the sensations associated with looking, selfing, etc. The stops lead to blissful feelings arising along with very pleasant warmth (these took a little bit of time to really develop) and a narrowing of focus. I seem to be now going through the dukkha nanas again but in a very attenuated form.

!!

Spent a good deal of time cycling yesterday. Had some really amazing periods where it was quite easy to generate metta/karuna/etc. I sat last night for a half hour as well and did second gear. It was a somewhat shallow ride, however when I first sat and was going through A&P I was very absorbed into the visual field in some way. There was a boundlessness to it, and it was fairly bright. I've had this happen before it's very odd.

Also I found myself motivated to do some little chores I had been planning to do for a while but could never bring myself to actually do (e.g. clean the windows in my car).