Eric_G goes for Three

Old Journal:
kennethfolkdharma.wetpaint.com/thread/45...27s+Practice+Journal

Sitting every other day or so. Not super motivated to sit.

Sat with a group last night, very tranquil, almost shockingly so. Visual field was highly detailed. Played a bit with directing the mind towards 1st jhana, and then into 2nd, somewhat amazed I could do it. I get a bit lost as to directing after that. I'm not sure the formless area is completely off limits, but the mind doesn't seem to want to incline that way as easily as some other times. Seemed to notice cycling (1-2-3-4-3-2-1) in a way that would suggest Review B.

Trying to quantify, after 1st path, I noticed:
* more calm
* more awareness
* harder to get caught in drama

At this point, I would say slightly more of the same, although I would maybe use the word tranquil instead of calm, I feel there is a slightly greater depth and stillness there that needs to be mentioned. My theory is that exposure to the arupa jhanas kind of breeds this into consciousness. More awareness, it seems like embedded periods are shorter and drama is caught more quickly. There is also more of a quality of openness that I associate with psychedelics, kind of a richness and 3 dimensional-ness that is hard to put a finger on. Kind of like if you had seen a cave, you knew the cave, but now you go back in and see a few more details that you hadn't quite noticed before.

Still not feeling much like sitting, but sitting every other day or so. Almost blew off a 4 hour retreat yesterday, but decided to do it anyway and see how it went. According to my one line per day meditation log, last time in review I skipped a whole week of formal practice.

On the first sit of the retreat, I was amazed again (like my last post) at the immediate strong tranquility and stillness. Kind of reminds me of when I got SE last spring and could first get into formless jhanas.

I spent a token amount of time working on remaining in 1st and 2nd jhana, and I seemed to notice cycling. At a minimum I noticed periods that were quite bright in the A&P type area with some pulsing and flashing, and then other times that were darker, and then a nice panoramic equanimity, all of these many times in 4 hours. Not noticing fruitions.

Wanted to share about a friend who has been into meditation for many years. I turned him on to Mahasi-Kenneth noting recently, here are a couple of quotes:

"I tried the noting again last night. The advice about noting every second seems to be having a good effect. At that rate, it's hard to think about anything else!"

"Your recent advice to me about the details of noting really made a huge difference. In the past week, I've made some serious progress in quieting the incessant chatter and avoiding falling asleep, so I'm finally climbing out of my 2 year rut."

Yesterday noticed some A&P stuff here and there. Sometimes I get a little "teardrop" of light that moves from the corner of my eye down along the lower lid, and the usual stuff in meditation, and some general joy throughout the day. Not sure it makes much sense map-wise, I wouldn't have thought I would be there yet or that I'm even out of review.

Also noticed a very clear presentation of jhanas 5 - 6 - 7, characteristics really clear and obvious.

And, a bit vague, but whatever changes I was going through last summer into fall, there is a component of, say, self awareness or self and otherness (along with spaciousness, stillness, tranquility), and I would say that process has accelerated in the past few weeks. And I haven't been doing much formal practice. Let's say there is an ability to imagine others, for example. Now expand that out to imagine all of their imaginings. There is some kind of bandwidth expansion or something along those lines.

Sitting about every other day. 40 min. today. Off cushion I try to remember the witness and take that step back.

Think I noticed a fruition or two last night before sleep. Today noticed 2 - 3 - 4 - blip, stayed in equanimity.

Noticed that imaginings seem to be more distant than physical sensations, not sure that's true. But that's how it felt.

More on what I mentioned last post as vague. The other night I noticed that I was composing an email in my head, and that I had visualized an entire paragraph, i.e. the actual text of several sentences. Not sure that in my life I had ever visualized even as much as a single sentence, in terms of seeing the actual words, much less a whole paragraph. Kind of goes along with this bandwidth expansion idea.

Lots of blips before sleep last night.

In terms of "riding the witness," I was thinking about "riding the nothingness."

I feel simultaneously that progress is being made, and yet in some ways it feels like I have regressed. I see much room for improvement. Looking forward to a time when I want to sit more.

Haven't been practicing much, had a 4 day streak of no practice, and now 3 days of ~50 minutes.

Kind of wish that I had put in just a quick 15 minutes a day to "keep in shape" as I feel like I'm working my way back. Having to do more out loud noting and generally having to keep a fairly strong intent to stay continuous, whereas a couple of months ago it was more automatic and I could do sustained periods of 2nd/3rd gear practice with relatively little effort.