Rod's Practice Journal

Great to have the new platform – thanks Kenneth and all who worked to get this happening.

So I am unsure as to whether I should bring over my practice journal or just start here and continue on – a fresh start might be good.

So at this point – I am pre-path and pretty sure I am pre-A&P. I have been able to get to 4th Jhana (I think thats what it is) and routinely get into 1st and 2nd Jhanas to refine concentration and now am dropping into noting in meditation once that is done.

Off the cushion practice is noting as much as I can and pulling myself back to it through the day with HAIETMOBA as a reminder statement. My working day is very busy and diverse so I am finding it hard to keep focus and always concerned I am falling backwards. My daily practice is:

* Morning meditation, yoga stretches and 85 pushups

* During day is noting as much as I can remember to and general contemplation on mindfulness objects when I am not noting

* Evening yoga stretches, meditation before sleeping.

Even though I am highly motivated to continue practice and deal with the slow times etc, at the moment it is hard to meditate as deeply as I was around Christmas because I get pretty tired from work and in the mornings my mind is really hard to quieten down whereas before I had very strong concentration. There is progress happening, but its fragmented at the moment.

This topic was modified 1 month, 2 weeks ago by Rod1.
[b:twxlwuq7]February 1, 2013 at 5:44 am #1066[/b:twxlwuq7]

Rod1
Member
[b:twxlwuq7]Update 01/02/2013[/b:twxlwuq7]

Things have settled down practice-wise. I managed to equilibrate to the added distractions being back at work and am now getting two focused meditations a day – mostly sitting rather than lying down. Had a great first session with Kenneth and that helped me to do shorter more effective meditations with Jhanas. Now I can drop into Jhanas quickly and the time meditating is spent more efficiently – I can get straight to 4th Jhana and set up a stable ‘platform’ for mindfulness/noting etc. without the usual 2 hours or so of fiddling around trying to work out which Jhana I am in and trying to ‘experience’ it extensively to prove to myself I am actually in it! Sounds crazy as I try to explain that! I will continue to improve my technique here.

Off the cushion noting is ok but I would like to be more rigorous with it. From what I have experienced with Jhanas and what I am reading about other people’s experience with key milestone events on the path such as A&P and stream entry etc, it seems that the recurring theme is letting go. I do find that the more I let go during meditation, the deeper I can go particularly with Jhanas. So I am generally trying this in all things to see if it has an impact on attaining insights and progress – interesting to try because I can see that it is hard to let go of what you haven’t realised you are holding onto (if that makes sense). It certainly makes me feel good in general so that’s a plus. In a pretty good space and highly motivated – not sure where I am on a map really but I guess I will know if something significant happens and maybe if I ‘don’t care’ (let go) all will be revealed.

February 7, 2013 at 3:58 am #1139

Rod1
Member
[b:twxlwuq7]Update 07/02/2013
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Continuing to refine Jhana skills, and continue noting. This week has been working on 3rd Jhana as I found that hard to distinguish from just a milder 2nd Jhana and exploring its inherent characteristics. Also trying to get to 4th at some point in the sit to experience the calm and try insighting whilst there.

The main issue has been work and uni demands – pretty tired but if I can get the time, meditating helps refresh. Yesterday had a longer sit in the morning and went in to work later – the sit was scattered, unfocussed. All day I had a dull headache and felt a little sad again (this happened a few weeks ago just for one day except without the headache) and as before, it was not all consuming – I was able to just watch it and not be involved. I very rarely get headaches or feel sad (without a strong reason – which there was none) so these are notable. It occurred to me that maybe I am cycling through DN then up to EQ and back down again. I can get very intense Jhana experiences so it might be hard to distinguish them from A&P….or maybe its just part of normal practice. Not sure but generally feel even and calm and happy.

Had a good sit last night and this morning and felt great today if a little removed from things. This morning got into 4th Jhana territory (or a state of very calm equanimity with no feeling of body connectedness and expansive horizontal awareness which was great. I tried to expand my attention in a 360 deg radial horizontal format as far beyond my ‘visual field’ as possible. It started to feel infinite and at that point change was occurring, I felt lighter, as if lifting of the ground. At this point excitement rose slightly and I could not penetrate any further – I wanted to let that settle but ran out of time. So will try to return to that point again over the next couple of sits as it was interesting and seemed to be some threshold and I feel instinctively that I should push through it.

So as before, applying the ‘don’t care’ approach and just keeping going (‘don’t care’ doesn’t mean slack practice – diligence and effort are strong). Every day is a little different and interesting and from that can assume progress is occurring.

February 14, 2013 at 6:18 am #1218

Rod1
Member
[b:twxlwuq7]Update 14/02/13[/b:twxlwuq7]

Something has changed/shifted this week. Last few weeks, practice has been up and down with good meditations and difficult ones (see practice log) – you could say its been ‘rocky’. Then on Saturday night I started to really focus and sit in 4th Jhana (or what I think it is). after that sit everything became really easy. I could get into 1-4 Jhanas very quickly and they were well defined and I had more control without much effort. Monday morning had a great 4th jhana sit and pretty much walked around all day feeling really balanced and calm almost like I had a protective coating on while I was highly productive in what was a really busy day. Its been like that all week. Tuesday night (typically 16 hr day with work and uni after) normally wipes me out but this time I felt calm and alert all day and night and was able to get to 2nd Jhana sitting on the bus! Today had a flight for work and both there and back got into 2nd Jhana during the flight and then used the afterglow concentration to note. I wanted to understand if sitting in 4th Jhana correlates to being in equanimity since the MCTB maps indicate its similar mind strata and if so how can I use it to advance since its really pleasant and stable and peaceful. There was some talk about it on DHO indicating it was possible to cover the 11 Nanas from the 4th Jhana which may minimise the DN.

Last night I was meditating lying down and was in 4th Jhana and must have drifted off then woke up to an experience of something like a light switch being turned on and off repeatedly causing my eyes to blink really hard in sync with it and involuntarily – this happened for a few seconds I guess then things settled down and I was back awake. Maybe this was just a sleep/waking thing – not sure.

All this has sharpened my curiosity about where I might be i.e. how far from Stream Entry I may be and thus what I might do to assist the process in my practice.

Noting is going on but I still am not as diligent with it as I could be. I try to maintain momentum through the day with small HAIETMOBA intervals. Found some helpful advice through non-dual awareness blog as well which could be another tactic for daily practice.



February 28, 2013 at 4:10 am #1371

Rod1
Member
[b:twxlwuq7]Update 28/02/2013
[/b:twxlwuq7]
Very interesting couple of weeks. After the last post, the following week showed that I had reverted to struggling through the week in my daily sits and noting was also pretty poor. So after a rough week, I decided to step up the noting and really focused on it over the weekend and by Sunday night I was getting into 4th Jhana again. Reading other peoples questions on DHO I think I finally worked out what is going on! Doh!! and feeling pretty stooopid.

So in my sits I am going through Jhanas but it seems also I am tripping through the nanas as well – this occurred to me when I asked the question about some really intense pinprick itching I was getting on my face through stages of meditation. In one sit it was so strong that it jolted me off balance! I asked the question and the answer was 9th nana with a quote from sagely text as backup and another person stating they were experiencing the same thing. Then it all seemed to make sense. In my sits I am tripping through the nanas as I weave my way through Jhanas reaching equanimity at 4th Jhana which depending on how strong it was, I am swapping between 11th nana and 4th Jhana…..I think! If correct, this is amazingly helpful to me.

So over this week I have been focusing my sits on getting to 4th Shamata Jhana and equanimity? strengthening it so my ‘centre of gravity’ is there and this might set me up for stream entry if I am patient and relaxed? Thats the theory – If anyone is reading this and sees it differently, please set me straight if I have this all wrong.

So over the past week, I have been getting to 4th jhana routinely and spending up to an hour there, watching whatever happens. Improvement is there where last night I was able to get into 4th jhana within a couple of minutes of starting the sit. The itching pin pricks on my face are far less or non-existent presumably because I am passing through these nanas too quickly for them to be experienced fully?

So its getting easier to get up to 4th Jhana and abide there. It brings me to thinking about the hardness of the jhana – if this were a really hard jhana it might make it harder to shift across to 11th nana and back again – so maybe being in a softer jhana is a good thing – it all seems like a wholesome organic process at this point that is unfolding naturally. It may be that my struggling experiences over the past weeks has resulted from me trying to solidify Jhanas and thus experiencing the Dukkha nanas more fully as I was dwelling at certain points ‘on the ladder’?

Lots of questions! Guess I will keep practicing and the truth of things will become clearer.

Really appreciate any input on this stuff as I am kind of feeling my way and clearly not so smart with it, its pretty funny as I watch myself stumbling through this stuff

Rod



March 4, 2013 at 5:23 am #1402

Rod1
Member
[b:twxlwuq7]Update 04/03/2013
[/b:twxlwuq7]
This is really a log of the last few days and freaky stuff that has happened. I will be concise

* Saturday.....Had a good instruction session with Kenneth – discussing a practice I was looking at of broad-scape noticing (as distinct from noting) where I was trying to notice all things around me at once constantly as a means of mopping up all thought bandwidth during the day at work, in meetings etc.
* So for the rest of Saturday I walked about trying out this expanded awareness above and beyond my head/body – typically over the top and out the back of my head (similar to how I try to move towards 4th Jhana)
* I found this quite easy to do and it resulted in an unfamiliar feeling by the end of the day, almost Euphoric.
* At night I was at the computer reading up on things Buddhist as usual and I came across The Recognition of Cessation (Nirodhasañña) where the Buddha describes how the self isn’t this and that. It seemed easy for me to think this through and it really resonated with me (I have read this before but this time seemed to mean more) so that by the time I was about to meditate for the evening I was highly charged with energy to be free of the suffering of self and I really ‘got’ why I wanted to be free of that etc. and really wanted it (under no illusions that I was going to get it anytime soon).
* So I started meditating, in Shamata jhanas as usual – go through 1,2,3 and get to 4 and stabilise, watch and understand. Was proving to be a good sit. Then things got weird…
* I hung on 2nd jhana for a while then continued to 3rd and had started to settle in 4th and then started to watch the flickering in my eyes (usually watch that and try to figure out how I might be able to see behind it – whats there when the ‘light is off’ but its all pretty fast. Suddenly, I was overtaken by this big rush of tingling and vibration (very much like a really strong 2nd jhana) but I was in 4th Jhana? My breathing was fast and laboured as I sat there trying to experience it without falling over. It passed after a few minutes I guess.
* I then moved to my bed and lay down. Started meditating again – same method. It was a struggle to get past 3rd Jhana and I spent alot of time fiddling around the edge of 4th and decided to start watching phenomena anyway – focused on the flickering in the eyes and then became aware that I could ‘hear’ flickering too ever so slightly. I focused in on that and the eye flickering at the same time – the normal buzzing in my ears was arranging into audio ‘flickering’, fascinated at this. At that point I reached a short but stable state (like a jhana) where the whole visual field solidified into a TV screen of interference snow – very consistent and vibrating. Then it was gone. I kept going and it happened again. I was tired after that and went to sleep
* Additionally during both meditation sessions there was this really fast flash of black – like one of those subliminal images that flashes up on the screen of some movies except this was all black/nothing. Weird.
* Next morning I felt like I was hungover – so tried to get to 4th Jhana to relax and do nothing and achieved that.
* I felt edgy and hungover all day, but got some relief with a small sit with little effort mid afternoon. A headache tab would probably have fixed it I guess.
* That night was a good sit reaching 4th jhana territory and stabilising.
* Next day felt tired but basically happy with good sits.
* Noticed that my concentration and ability to get into Jhanas was better. All week I have been able to get to 4th Jhana and ‘surf’ between different Jhanas pretty much at will.
* When in 4th Jhana – I try to expand my awareness that results in lots of tingling on the crown of my head. Not sure I am getting into 5th Jhana - I seemed to hit this barrier as if ‘my mind couldn’t get out of my skull’ feeling
* Otherwise, all has been pretty stable after that with 2 meditations a day. I have backed off noting (wasn’t much good at it anyway) but will start it up again.
- Is this just surfing around the Dukkha Nana’s?
- Was there an A&P event in there or just a strong (and unexpected) 2nd Jhana?
- I am still trying to see sense in it.
- Or was it just one of those inexplicable weird meditation experiences that just happens?

Welcome any opinions on this.
By the way, my wife thinks I am crazy <!-- s:? --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_confused.gif" alt="" title="Confused" /><!-- s:? -->

16/03/13 - log update
Sits have been consistent through the past couple of weeks and have been unaffected by daily stresses etc which used to be the case. Trying out a 'second sleep' experiment when possible ideally to use a couple of hours in the middle of the night if awake, on sitting or contemplating rather than just churning and stressing. Early days but seems possible so far. Fatigue is an issue but more due to work - I sleep soundly and I have been waking up naturally in the middle of the night after a couple of hours sleep feeling like it was 8 hours or more. So seeing where that all goes.

Most notable experience has been reflecting on any lasting effects of a extraordinary experience I had a couple of weeks ago - one described in previous entry above. Since then, getting into Jhanas has been quicker and easier and I find my daily mood state is more equanimous and detached from whatever is going on around me. I have been trying to remember the sequence of events during that experience but twice during that night once on the cushion and once lying down I experienced minute instants of blackness - like a blink or subliminal black scene flashing before my eyes - notable for how different it was to all the rest of what was going on and how uniformed and fast. Never seen that before.
More curious to me was that as I woke up this morning (Saturday) it happened again, I wasn't meditating just waking up and was conscious just about to get out of bed and this blink happened again. I felt excited after it with a flush of tingling but nothing extreme, just a little flush of excited curiosity since it was so unique and was the same as had happened twice a couple of weeks ago. Not sure what this is but will see if it happens again. I am not particularly prone to wild experiences and witnessing supernatural events etc, no visions or alien visitations etc so for something like this to happen is high on my weird -o-meter but happy to accept it might just be in the 'weird stuff from meditating' bag. Interested to see if anyone else has had this and what it might be.
I know, I know - 'just keep practicing!' <!-- s:roll: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_rolleyes.gif" alt="" title="Rolling Eyes" /><!-- s:roll: -->

17/03/13
I decided to post on this log more frequently to record more definition on what I am experiencing to confirm or refute if I have gotten stream entry or not. I had about an hour sit last night which was my usual Jhana surf and watching sensations and phenomena whilst in 4th Jhana. I focussed in on the strobing as agreed with Kenneth in yesterday's instruction. The strobing as always been there but looking for any change in rate or discontinuity.

This morning managed to meditate to for about 2.5 hours mostly sitting in 4th Jhana but seemed to get into other deeper states but might just be deeper 4th. Experienced a funny reality 'warp' leading to a reduction in background thoughts and clearer vision field but was different to the blackouts although had more of a 'reset' quality to it. Might have been just shifting between mind strata. No blink-outs in these sits.

Generally, I have always had strobing in my closed field of awareness and for the past few months always had tingling and been able to induce low Jhana factors (Piti, Sukkha) anytime. Over the past 2 weeks, I have been more detached from emotions and stresses, and its been easier to get into Jhanas and move up and down. A&amp;P has been hard to identify for me as I always go through 2nd Jhana which to me feels very similar. So I am not sure if I am cycling through the whole thing every time I meditate or not - at some point during every session I usually get intense itchy spots on my face that come and go - like passing through a layer (which Kenneth identified as 3rd Nana) so I know that somewhere through my meditation I am passing through 3rd Nana. By the end of my sits, I am almost always in 4th Jhana which is equivalent to 11th Nana but really am not sure if from that it can be said I am getting 11th nana or not. This stuff is really confusing..for me at least. <!-- s:? --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_confused.gif" alt="" title="Confused" /><!-- s:? -->

Keep reporting in as much detail as possible, Rod. These landmarks are easier to diagnose on hindsight. Try sitting for 45 minutes or an hour without any agenda whatsoever and just passively observe what is going on. Write down detailed notes immediately after the sitting. See if there is a recognizable sequence of events. Do this each day and over time a picture is likely to emerge.

Thanks Kenneth. Really appreciate your advice - will do.

1) Non-Jhana meditation undertaken for 65 mins (kneeling with seiza chair on cushion). No objective other than watching breath and identifying any sensations or phenomena arising. Began with tingling energy which settled quickly. Consistent rate of increasing stillness and concentration. Occasional thought strings developing and noticed associated muscle tensions in arm, hand and legs on different occasions. Achieved deep still level of concentration. Noticed that external noises were more startling than when in Jhana meditation. Most notable phenomena was about half way through meditation a change occurred commencing with light appearing to the right of the field of vision modifying field of vision from randomly appearing and disappearing strobing shapes to a consistent field (similar to snowy TV screen) but not as tightly grouped. The emergence of this phenomenon was accompanied by a significant increase in breathing rate. This continued for a short time as a stable state and then gradually disappeared with breathing returning to very low level –same as before the phenomenon occurred.

2) Jhana meditation undertaken for 2 hours (lying down). No objective other than to reach 4th jhana and identify any sensations or phenomena arising. Approached 4th jhana directly rather than taking 12&amp;3 due to the fact that I was already in strong concentration and it was most similar to 4th jhana. Took a little time to find stable strata. Once found, very quickly shifted to a very wide open level naturally (in fact I was inadvertently stopping it by trying to hold the strata I was in, then let go) which was very euphoric from the awareness of being part of a massive space – this was very stable and I took this to be 5th jhana and recognised I had been here only once before and not for very long. After considerable time there, another shift occurred to a stratum that was hard to describe – whilst expansive it was more complex and I was not sure what characteristics to look at. Towards the end of the session, it appeared that I moved back to 4th or something less absorbed. At this point I stopped the session.

3) I wasn’t going to post this experience up as it was so weird, real and sounds insane that I was embarrassed but over the past couple of days since it happened, I thought I should record it because it was such a BIG experience and I can only deduce that it was an A&amp;P event.
Straight after these meditation sessions (described above) it was late and I lay down to go to sleep but was not tired. Suddenly I found myself in an experience where I was awake with what could be described as bolts of energy being fired into the top/back of my heard (it was so intense that the spot where they were hitting was burning) followed by very strong vibratory energy in a long line shooting up and down my body increasing then decreasing in rate of vibration and sound (almost techno mechanical sounds corresponding to the energy vibrations). Really intense energy that was almost too much to handle. It felt neither good or bad. I felt no fear or happiness or stress. These two events were all consuming and occurred in sequence over and over. Due to the nature of the energy and the sounds and there was a feeling that I was being ‘rebuilt’ – my body actually felt like a car being built or serviced by industrial robots! There were other energy related things happening which I can’t exactly remember but after a while of experiencing this, I was able to move my head and I looked up (was lying on my side during all this) and a ‘being’ (person/female) dull white glow was sitting on the bed next to me smiling and let me know that it was done, there were sexual undertones to this being. I came out of it and looked at the clock and 15 minutes had passed. I didn’t sleep for the rest of the night but it was because I wasn’t tired – I felt intrigued and reviewed the experience but wasn’t freaked out. The next day I was fine, not tired at all and very calm and equanimous but not spaced out and was able to function normally at work. Today I felt really calm and the normal mental chatter and internal emotional stressed responding to what happens through the day were either gone or greatly reduced – actually I feel really good but in a balance and calm and relaxed way.

Update 20/0313
Over the last couple of days I have been feeling very calm and balanced. Noticeably reduced mental chatter (although not completely gone). I have not been noting much - the mental activity that constituted alot of contemplation around questioning sensations, noting etc is not there as much. So whatever the case, so far there has been a shift. Not sure if its permanent or not. So I will conciously start noting and questioning again through the day. Last night I meditated for about 1.5 hours (45 minutes sitting and the rest lying down until falling asleep). I went up through jhanas but was not very focussed. Got to 4th but was pretty scattered and couldn't do much insight. There were also some other levels or strata experienced but not sure what they were - maybe different levels of 4th but definately more expansive and 'light'.
THis morning woke up at 4.30 am so was able to meditate lying down till 7.00 when I got up. Its always hard to wake the mind up enough to meditate but this morning it was not as hard as usual. I went though the jhanas up to 4 but moved to another state (probably 5) and stabilised - very expansive and feeling light. Through this time there were some shifts that suggested other levels but not sure - not distinct differences. One glitchy event which was a little similar to the black blips I had over the past couple of weeks but not the same. Trying to watch the strobing - there were 'visual' shapes forming and dissolving as usual and they were strobing but there was more evidence of the snowy TV screen look to things where there were lots of individual points strobing around and behind the shapes. Was hard to tell if the rate of strobing was changing or evidence of intermittent strobing but all in all this was different territory. Definitely a intrigued and excited by the weird phenomena that has occurred over the past couple of weeks. Things are definitely different than they were but just not sure what is happening. Its harder because I have used jhanas meditation since I started so not sure what nanas (if any) I am progressing through - the good part is that I have not experienced Dark Night in any noticeable way, the bad part is I haven't experienced any nanas in any noticeable way but some progress is occurring - maybe I have just reached the start! That would be a dark joke <!-- s:oops: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_redface.gif" alt="" title="Embarrassed" /><!-- s:oops: --> but if thats the case, then at least I would realise it and adjust views accordingly. Either way, it has been interesting with little blackout blips and mind blowing experiences etc, I feel calm and less stressed and less subject to emotional rollercoaster so whatever the stage I have been at over the past couple of weeks, it is good now and thats worth it. <!-- s;) --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_wink.gif" alt="" title="Wink" /><!-- s;) -->

Log update 21/03/13
Sat last night for 1.5 hours (45 mins on cushion, and 45 mins lying down). Difficult session due to very agitated and erratic energy prevailing. Started off with very strong concentration getting into solid 1-2 jhana within a few breaths of sitting but then gradually the energy became more unbalanced and disharmonious so that I could not hold in any jhana for long and spent most of the session struggling. Lots of energy going in different directions and high amount of variance in intensity – not comfortable – watched it for a while. Stopped session once I realised it was not going to achieve anything by fighting it.

This morning meditated from 4am to 6.50am lying down. Started very lightly as I was assuming the disharmony was still there. I found that 3rd jhana was easiest to stabilise in so I stayed there for a while which helped a lot and then things settled significantly so I continued to 4th jhana and then another state that I assume is 5th jhana(?) not sure but whatever it is, it was lighter than 4th, more open and expansive, very stable and easy to do insight from. Once there I noted all sensations etc. Most notable sensation was a blackout blip or a glitch and whatever it was, it was followed by a little rush of tingles but it was so quick. Also went through a stage of intense facial itchiness in spots which subsided fairly quickly but was quite intense. I started noting again once I got out of bed – in shower, eating breakfast etc. but its patchy. A slower day at work today so I am able to look at more noting and observer/watcher technique and updating log in free moments.

Generally feeling more motivated to do daily practice than I have over the past couple of weeks where I have been feeling great but not really interested to do practice beyond sitting (there was a sense of taking a break after reaching something - but maybe I was just needing a break anyway)

I see that in previous posts you are labelling mind states as desirable and undesirable. Do you also notice them as they happen? Do you try to dispassionately notice the label you attach to those mind states?

[quote:zdi5u3u1]I could not hold in any jhana for long and spent most of the session struggling[/quote:zdi5u3u1]
Vipassana and samatha can go hand in hand. If the mind can't be tamed to do samatha and you find yourself repeatedly drawn to objects other than your chosen object, struggling for too long can undermine your motivation. I think it's more productive to switch to noti(ci)ng the objects that the mind is drawn to, than to continue to struggle.
Some other times, when doing vipassana, you may feel exhausted from following the mind to all the places it goes. Then, a gentler vipassana technique might be useful, or just resting in the breath, to prevent the mind from scattering. Sometimes following the breath can feel like a chore, and some other times it can feel like a refuge. See if you can identify those moments, on or off the cushion, and abide in the breath.

[quote:zdi5u3u1]Stopped session once I realised it was not going to achieve anything by fighting it.[/quote:zdi5u3u1]
Before stopping any session out of frustration, it might be useful to give it an extra 5 minutes while investigating the frustration and its cause. Even if the session was a samatha one.

Hi Nick,

Thanks for your comments and advice - its very helpful. Using jhanas alot, can definitely narrow ones focus to only what is happening in and around jhana states rather than the bigger picture. I will take this on board and develop further. It is becoming more evident that working with what is available at the time is more useful than frustrations etc associated with trying to get to what is not available. I am finding more that the territory around jhana states is just as useful as being in them for insight especially when alternating between concentration and insight in a session. I take your point that there is also insight value in investigating the reasons and motivations behind where one chooses to be or can't be within a session as well. Thanks will reflect and incorporate.

Log update 22/03/2013
Last night session was a pretty uneventful session compared to recent events. Sat for 50 mins then lay down for 1 hr moving through jhanas reaching 4th then exploring this 'new territory' which might be 5th. No agitation like last night - so pretty similar sit to the morning sit. Less intense itching in the face - maybe because I seemed to move through things faster this time. Got to '5th' and stayed there and watched the flickering and tried to detect inconsistencies in rate and noted the 3 dimensional nature of the shapes by way of the flickering being stronger and sharper on the parts of the shapes that were closer to my awareness than further away, as usual alternating awareness/attention from flickering shapes to maintaining the stability of the state - I guess this is what is described as insight and concentration together.

Log update 23/03/2013
Note: had a drink with colleagues after work and gossip-style conversations ensued. I watched how I felt very little urge to be involved and found I was putting forward balancing comments to counter the negative points being raised about particular people. Right speech has really increased in my thoughts lately and the workplace is the most difficult place to practice it.

Last night got to meditate (lying down) a bit later than usual (10.20) but being Friday night, no need to get up early in the morning. So tried to 'jump' into 4th jhana straight after a short breath watching. Got there eventually but was dropping in and out and it was really interesting. Out of the state, I observed strong energy moving around and then I would get into the jhana and it was all smoothed over and muted. Very interesting effect like turning noise cancelling on and off on headphones. I got into 4th and stabilised and watched flickering and shapes, thoughts, feelings, tensions build and relax in my neck and shoulders. I presume I fell asleep a couple of times but when I 'came to' or became aware again, i found I was still in the concentrated state and the flickering would start really slow (about 1 or even less per second) then gradually speed up. I checked the clock and it was 12.30 so went to sleep.
Woke up at 4.30am and started to watch breath noticing that the thoughts that have abounded at this time in the past were reduced to one or two thought 'streams' only. Moved through jhanas 3rd and stayed a while then onto 4th but had difficulty getting beyond that so stayed there and watched. In the last half hour, I moved out of the meditation and just noted including noting breath got up 8.20am. Something interesting I found was how close to the 'surface' the meditative state is getting to wakeful state - of course what level of concentration that can be accessible is highly variable given the situation, but over time, it seems that there has developed a much thinner line between alert/awake and meditative state. I guess someone adept at wakeful noting would know this territory very well. I presume this could be useful in practice and will explore more - although getting hit by a bus would not be so useful I can imagine.

Post: After reading some articles - I realised I need to watch/consider 3 C's more during sessions.

Log update 24/03/13

Last night sat for 50 mins on seiza bench then transferred to lying down for 1.5 hrs then went to sleep. Spent longer on breath before getting into Jhanas to improve concentration before starting. Spent more time in each Jhana and when getting to 4th, I stayed for a while watching sensations, formations, flashing and thought streams then spent the rest of the session exploring the 'new territory' of what I think is 5th jhana. It was not as easy to get into as it has been over the past week and I think it was technique related. I was definitely forcing things and getting focused on one particular way which probably was not helpful. Focusing on the infiniteness of space separate to me rather than including me/my perspective, in that perception/relationship. Once I started doing that, things opened up further to a more expansive awareness than 4th although the edges between the 2 are pretty blurry and I am not convinced that its a different jhana yet. Whatever the case its a peaceful and still state and good to perform insight from. From this point and whilst in 4th Jhana, I noted the lack of self in whatever I was aware of and also the impermanence of it. Not sure I am doing this effectively as it is pretty easy to do and I know this to be true already so there is probably something I a missing about this an will search info further for technique descriptions.

Woke up this morning at 5.20am and started with the breath for 30 mins approx then worked through jhanas till 8.05 The objectives for this session were to practice swapping between jhanas (not in order) and also to drop out of jhanas to evaluate the mental strata at that point and try to become aware of any distinguishing characteristics of corresponding Nanas at that level that I might have access to. After reading an article last night on Hamilton Project website [url:em04d0g1]http&#58;//thehamiltonproject&#46;blogspot&#46;com&#46;au/2011/01/talking-in-jhanas&#46;html[/url:em04d0g1] I felt this was worth experimenting. It also was encouraging as it suggested that access to jhanas and using jhanas in practice did not negate development and movement through Nanas. So I spent time trying to do correlate between the two. This was not overly successful and probably needs practice. No problems getting in and out of Jhanas and moving between them (4th to 2nd was easy but 4th to first was a little tough - jarring) I also found after spending a fair time in 4 and 5th(?) it was difficult to get back to the lower jhanas - the mind would snap back up to the stable calm state of the higher Jhanas. Watching for evidence of Nanas was hard. THe only evidence I have ever tended to get is the intense itching on the face around the nose and ears usually at one point through the course of a session which I am told is either 3rd or 9th Nana. So I know I am crossing that territory. The other hint is that sometimes the thought streams that pop up might be of a particular 'flavour'. There may be something pop up or you find the mind gets caught up in thoughts that are unsavoury or distasteful which I can only surmise might be evidence of passing through the Dukkha nanas. So part of my effort here was to watch the 'flavour' of thought streams that emerge at the time of dropping out of a Jhana as possible evidence of the nana area I might be in. Sound all pretty logical etc but it seems my experience of the nanas is pretty subtle - this may have to do with the particular style of meditation I have chosen to develop as a platform (shamata). I also found as the session progressed that thoughts tend to be pretty sparse - the inner chatter is pretty low. I will keep up with this though because I am always worried that not much is happening - I feel I should be 'doing' more. There is plenty to do with daily practice, no dispute there and am increasingly looking at mundane behaviour patterns to challenge what I do and why and if it is helpful to my practice or indeed beneficial to those around me.

Last night sat for 45 mins on bench then 2 hrs lying down (8.30 - 11.15). No specific phenomena to report - moved up and down Jhanas, stabilising in each and holding in 4th. Tried to sync up all sensory sensations with flashing again and consider this from the point of impermanence, no self and dissatisfaction/suffering (3 C's) I did this and it all made sense but can only assume its useful on a subconscious or very subtle level. I saw all sensate experience as a changing set of scenes synced to rate of flashing like the scenes on a movie reel. Each iteration requiring the whole sensate impression to be reconstructed at the rate of more than once a second. I marvelled at how much energy this would take the mind to do. Then I wondered about the backdrop to all this - nothing? - and how I might change perception to pickup the non-view rather than the view of the flashing. I expanded my awareness of this to take in all sensate experience at the time - people walking outside, cars going past, wind blowing trees, TV in the other room and the general 'noise' of existing. This was what I started to do when I first had experiences of blackout blips etc so maybe this gem has already been realised or further understanding is to found at levels of subtlety I have yet to reach. Generally, experiences have plateaued similar to a point I reached a few weeks ago before blips and crazy energy experiences etc.

This morning started meditating at 3.40am as I woke and continued to 6.30 when I got up. Started with first half hour of breathing and similar to last night - moved through jhanas, this time practicing jumping non-sequencially. This time noted I was tired and mind more distracted than usual (although not uncontrollable). This time, I tried looking for signs of nanas (feelings, correlating thoughts etc) and found little however overall feeling was not as calm as has been for the past couple of weeks. I have noticed fatigue/stress this morning. Once at work mid-morning I felt more calm and content and sense of equanimity from then on.
Have not been diligent with daily noting so will step that up to get things moving again (if that is what should happen).

Log Update 26/03/2013

Last night sat for 45 mins with no Jhanas - just sat and watched. Various shades of difference but basically going into ever deeper concentration with occasional intrusions of piti at the beginning but disappearing as I got deeper. Watching sensations again. Transferred to lying down and continued meditating for 1.5 hours with Jhanas - easy movement through Jhanas and practiced traversing the jhanic arc at least through the first 4 as Kenneth F mentions. The 5th(?) jhana or open space state is tricky to get into and very connected to 4th so still not clear on it. Felt a bit aimless at this point and a little concerned - watched the concern and let it go. What ever is or isn't happening is as it is (alot of is's ).

Woke up at 5.00am and watched breath through to 6.55 and got up. Noted I was tired, but not struggling and watched thought strings - for the most part I was able to watch them form and fall back to nothing once I had identified them. The concern returned but at that point I tried to jump to 4th Jhana if only to put myself in a calm state of mind for the day at work.

During lunch I was surfing on DHO and found a quote from Kenneth F regarding how to recognise Nanas which really clarified some things for me - quote as follows:
Some people are able to sustain themselves in equanimity even between retreats, but it isn't that they don't fall below it; it's that the highest ñana that you are able to achieve in your daily sittings tends to color your entire day. The cutting edge of practice, in this case equanimity (11th ñana) has to be reattained in each sitting. You start out at each sitting pre-first ñana, and if your practice is very good and the momentum of daily sitting is strong, you can rise up to your cutting edge in minutes or seconds.
If you are used to thinking of ñanas as lasting for some period of time, you can miss this. But if you pay careful attention during the first few seconds of your sitting, you can see the early ñanas flash by. The easiest one to spot, as always, is the 4th (A&amp;P); you might notice a brief bout of white light and/or a vibration in one of the extremities. This will quickly give way to a more diffuse awareness, perhaps a sense of coolness on the skin, and a feeling of chilled out bliss (all 3rd jhana/5th ñana phenomena), then a little rough patch of unpleasant sensations (dukkha ñanas 6-10) before the equanimity settles in. All of this can happen in less than a minute, so you really have to be on your game to notice it. If you stop meditating for a few weeks you can get rusty, and this process of rising up to the cutting edge of your practice will take longer.

After Path, it's always effortless and instantaneous to get up to the A&amp;P, even if you haven't practiced for awhile; in fact this is what is pointed to in the Buddhist cosmology when they say that after 1st Path you'll never again be reborn in the lower realms.

I really didn't realise that you can zip through Nanas so quick and was thinking that I wasn't moving through them at all because I was not aware of them like many others have stated they are. So reflecting on this through the afternoon whilst working, I sat as soon as I got home to try it out. I watched closely as I started to meditate and whilst it is either really really fast and I still can't see any, or I just don't get it yet. There were changes - Meditation for me always starts with lots of piti and sukkha even if I am not trying to get into Jhana - could I take this as A&amp;P? there is always some early disturbance which I presumed was just settling down - are the early Nanas of dissolution and Dukkha nanas being experienced here? I usually pass through some intense itching on the face in every session - sometimes a lot, sometimes a little. Is this one of the Dukkha Nanas? I always get to a deeply concentrated state (different time to get this) and then stabilise and try to see what I can see. Is this equanimity? OR is all this still at A&amp;P or earlier and I am actually only at the beginning of this little map and have misunderstood completely? Maybe I am just not the right person for this type of mapping of practice?
Reflective Note: Interesting questions but will keep going no matter what - motivation is high and the only way through it is through it so will continue regardless. Whatever the case, I have spent the last 5-6 months developing abilities at Jhanas/concentration which is a good platform to start with and was my original strategy. I also know I am going to look back at this and feel like an idiot to have wasted time pondering such things <!-- s:oops: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_redface.gif" alt="" title="Embarrassed" /><!-- s:oops: --> ! So continue I will (Yoda I have become <!-- s:D --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_biggrin.gif" alt="" title="Very Happy" /><!-- s:D --> )

Log Update 29/03/2013

Really busy at work and evening work commitments have made practice difficult and the only sure result has been fatigue. I have been able still get 2 sits per day in each around 1-2 hrs. Today is Good Friday and I have taken the opportunity to sleep and shed fatigue as best as possible. Then 3 days of stronger practice (Monday is public holiday here too).

Practice components included Jhana 'surfing' and watching sensations, phenomena etc in 4th and between jhanas. Fatigue has made it difficult to concentrate. Have also tried 'dry' sits with no jhana to try and watch for evidence of moving through different nanas - still hard to see any particular characteristics.

Overall, despite maintaining momentum, I am not sure what to do now except practice, watch and wait. Clearly I am in new territory but its pretty uninspiring. Prior to the 2 week period where clearly transformative phenomena occurred there was a build of intensity and motivation climaxing at that 2 week period which concluded with an A&amp;P event (don't know what else I could have been). Noticed dissolution after that and now things have flattened right out with little energy - not feeling bad, maintaining good humour and detachment - just perplexed. I have watched that and using the observations of these feelings to question motivations etc, so not wasting the opportunity to practice. Work has been particularly demanding lately and this is impacting practice - although I notice that I am less emotionally caught up in things - still trying not to waste time dwelling on stupid stuff. <!-- s:? --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_confused.gif" alt="" title="Confused" /><!-- s:? -->

Hey Rod,

Been reading your practice journal and appreciate you sharing it. I wish I had some answers for you. However, I do think that with the quality of your practice coupled with the quality of your journaling, things will shake themselves out and look clearer in the rear view mirror. You probably already know that. Keep up the good work and enjoy your long holiday!

Hi Dan,

Thanks so much for your message - amazing how a few words can be so encouraging especially at the moment where things seem pretty flat for me, so thank you . Reading through your log I really admire your perseverance to practice through your busy life, integrating your practice with daily obligations such as work and 1 year olds. You have set up a great framework to support your practice with the UU group and regular instruction sessions from Ron as well. I find reading about your approach to insight helpful too as this is an area I feel I need to develop, having spent more time on concentration up to now. Thanks and best wishes for your progress too.

Log Update 30/03/2013
Very tired yesterday - slept in the afternoon for about 3 hours with the last hour doing some lazy meditation - not normal for me.
Had a dull headache and feeling pretty flat - so early evening took a headache tablet. Meditated for 1.5 hours and noticed that 1st and 2nd jhanas were not comfortable but 3rd jhana helped ease things as did 4th. So took refuge there for the time and watched sensations from 4th jhana. Energy was jagged with flashing very high and big and aggressive. Can only imagine I am in Dukkha Nana territory, (I think I have been here before - it lasted a day or so just after Christmas). Went to sleep and had unpleasant dream. Interestingly, none of this is upsetting me - its not great but I feel a bit detached from it. I watched the dream and realised it was not pleasant but that was all.

Woke up this morning at 5.00 and tried to meditate. Watched the breath for a while then jumped straight into 3rd jhana since the flashing and energy was still big and unsettling - got to 4th and found peace there. Finished at 6.30 and got up. Had session with Kenneth and this helped alot. We looked at insight techniques using the feeling of pressure I have been feeling at the top of my head which correlated to a feeling of some process that was yet to finish - a feeling of energy flowing up to the top of my head and not being able to go anywhere. This causing tension. I was encouraged to search for corresponding tensions elsewhere in the body and work to ease those. I did this and found and easing of the top of head tension. I felt alot better after this and have felt back to my normal happy self since then. This has given me an angle I had not used before and I am looking forward to expanding this approach in insight meditation. I am not sure if what I went through was stream entry or not - but I do feel as if starting again - wherever that is on the path probably doesn't matter really - it is what it is. The fact is, there is still much to learn and much to let go of - much craving and aversion to understand and see through.

Hi, Rod, I read through your journal and am wondering whether you ever got an idea of what was happening back at the beginning of the month. It sounded like a breakthrough of some kind. Also, the event about 10 days ago, with the pressure in the head and the vision. To be honest, I am not all that great at mapping. It sounds similar to my A&amp;P experience, at least the pressure in the top of the head. I had strong pressure that climbed up my neck and to the crown, then subsided several times (this was prior to first path). When I finally reached steam entry months later, it felt like the top of my head blew off. Maybe this is the opening of the crown chakra.

Shinzen Young talks about the need for more data to get a clearer sense of how people experience these nanas. These journals of ours are a great place to start, I'd say.

Hi Jane,

Thanks for your email and appreciate your comments. To be honest I am not sure what has happened over the past month - the initial experience was after a build up of energy and on the day it happened I was walking around all day experimenting with broader awareness around me as a way of mopping up mental bandwidth (similar to noting except broader noticing). I found this fairly easy to do and by the end of the day was light headed, feeling euphoric and very concentrated. Then as the log entry for that day shows, things got really crazy. Since I had 3 black blips (2 in that first evening during meditation, then 2 weeks later, another one whilst getting out of bed an not meditating) I was thinking stream entry, because they were so unique, distinct and different to anything I had experienced before but now thinking probably not.

Sorry for the summary but the key point through all of this series of experiences is that its always had some tension, tingling energy happening at the top of my head. Even now, I can feel the tension building there again and will address it with the approach Kenneth taught me.

So Jane its really good to hear your experience of this as it might provide some pointers as to what I have been experiencing. I am not someone who is 'prone' to 'supernatural' and freaky experiences so this is definitely not usual for me. At this point, it feels like if the top of my head were to 'blow off' as you experienced, it would be the best thing, a relief. There definitely feels as if something is not finished yet with that area - energy flowing up and not being able to flow further/frustrated just inside my skull at the top and back of my head. In some of my meditation sessions I was actually pushing my mind to see if I could break through whatever barrier was there but it just led to more tension or no result.

Thanks for looking in on my log. I hope I have something useful to offer you too as I gain more experience - at this stage I am pretty ignorant <!-- s:) --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt="" title="Smile" /><!-- s:) -->

Log Update 31/03/2013

Felt much better yesterday and much more motivated to practice. Sat last night for 1 hour on seiza stool and 1 hour lying in bed then went to sleep. Addressed my posture after watching a Zen video which was really interesting and for some reason I seemed to focus in on the explanation of sitting correctly. I sat using the seiza stool as usual but this time straightened my back so it was balanced vertically and kept my head up. Realised my posture to date has been poor, slumped forward and bent back. As soon as I did this, I felt better and my body felt light and empty (probably not only because of the posture). I found jhanas were stronger and I could sit longer comfortably. Through the sit I stayed in each jhana longer than usual to keep concentration up (its not been great over the past few days) and then once in 4th Jhana I watched sensations and also my attitude towards them, the jhanas, the sitting comfort, the noises outside. Through the course of this I seemed to either go deeper into 4th than usual or access some other level - it was like 2nd jhana - really tingly and compelling but just in my head, while I could not really feel my body. The visual field looked as if I were travelling forward through the flashing and I went with this. THere grew the feeling that blackness was blanketing parts of the visual field, folding over partially obscuring view of flashing shapes. I watched this and felt tendency to assist the process but realised I should just watch. As usual I felt the 'ceiling' of my skull and the energy and my attention banging into it and not being able to get through. I reviewed my feeling of need to break through but no great insight offered except energy being frustrated in its path. I backed off. Once lying down, I worked through jhanas again and noted sensations and stabilised in 4th.

Woke up at 1.30 thinking I had slept a whole night (thats common) and started breathing from the belly and noting 'pulling breath in' and 'pushing breath out' also noting any itches or sensations or thought streams occurring etc. Took a bit of getting used to and I had to stop working the breath too hard and hyperventilating. This was also based on watching this Zen video which mentioned that breath should come from down just below the navel. Have heard this before but focused on other things at the time so didn't heed. Did this for about 45 minutes then returned to sleep. Wok up at 6.00pm and started meditating lying down - first with breath then jhanas. Got to 4th jhana and insighted from there posing a question as to the basis of all sensations that arose. Cats scratching at door so finished at 4th at 8.10am.

Tested out new noting app (messaged on DHO) with a noting session and found it really helpful and will use it every day now. It gave me a basis to structure noting (silent) and seemed to make it easier to do for me. (App is called Mind Blown and is free at the itunes App store if anyone interested - just referencing, not advertising)

Rod, I've been reposting all my old journals, the first under the title &quot;Laurel's Practice&quot;. Check out the posts for 6/29/11 on the second page of the thread, posts 81 and 82 according to the original numbering. I settled down into a routine of posting the old entries in batches of five so it may be a little confusing to find it. I haven't gotten to the stream entry posts yet, but will let you know when I do.

I've read about the app as well, but I don't have an iPhone. I wonder if it works for a Samsung Galaxy phone, or for an iPad. All these gadgets! BTE, your continuity of practice is fantastic!

Thanks Jane Laurel (which would you prefer? <!-- s:) --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt="" title="Smile" /><!-- s:) --> ) I have found them and reading through them. Quite a read! I really admire how you have stuck at it through what were very unpleasant and upsetting stages. The protracted A&amp;P process is interesting and I can see similarities in the areas that were affected - head, neck and the compelling energies leading to shaking etc. Comparing this to my experience, it may be that the whole thing I went through over that 2 week period was one big A&amp;P event. I had this experience when I first started that I posted on DHO and there was some debate as to whether this was A&amp;P. It was far less freaky than what I just went through although at the time was pretty intense (<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href=" www.dharmaoverground.org/web/guest/discu...ards/message/3742931 "> www.dharmaoverground.org/web/gue ... ge/3742931). I have not experienced jhanas quite like that since although there are some common elements with 2nd jhana.

The jhana practice does confuse things a bit - Whilst I am daily moving into 4th jhana and insighting from there (equivalent to 11th nana), I appear to be sitting back at 4th-5th nana - confusing to me. Will be keen to read your stream entry posts - thanks <!-- s:) --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt="" title="Smile" /><!-- s:) -->

I have been able to load the app on my ipad it loaded fine and seems functional - logged in and seems to work fine. Could be good on the ipad in those boring meetings at work <!-- s:) --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt="" title="Smile" /><!-- s:) --> Not sure about the Samsung Galaxy phone.
Thanks for the encouraging comments - appreciate it.

Log Update 02/04/2013
Sat Sunday night with 'improved' posture for 1 hour. Purposely stayed in each jhana for longer to keep up concentration. Once in 4th I investigated tingling and pressure in crown and this tendency to want to 'jump' out of my head and body. I pushed this to see what would happen and jumped into a state that I have been in before where it is like a 2nd jhana except only in the head - and like normal 4th jhana, there is no feeling in the body. Stayed in this state for a while then jumped to 2nd jhana which was instantly available and brought the whole body back with energy and tingling as usual. Then moved up to 3rd jhana and on to 4th. Once in 4th again, I started noting all sensations. I finished this session and lay down and continued to meditate - starting in 3rd jhana since my concentration level seemed to fit that, moved to 4th and noted sensations, thought streams etc for 1 hour and went to sleep.

Woke up at 1.30.am and started noting breath and then noting all thought streams. Strangely I fell into a dream and found I was noting in the dream which was weird. Not clear on what was dream and what was waking but generally a good experience. Woke up at 6.00 and started to note breath for about 30 minutes then dropped into jhanas through to 4th jhana and continued noting sensations from there. I listened to noises of people outside and watched how I responded to them both mentally and physically trying to see what induced the reactions. Finished session at 8.20am.

Sat and noted for about 15 minutes continuous using iphone app at rate of 1 note/second.
Lay down at 10.40 am and meditated till 11.45 noting in and out of jhanas.
Sat and noted at 5.30pm for about 20 minutes again using iphone app.

Meditated for 1 hour at 8.50pm reaching same state 'beyond' 4th jhana and similar to the previous night, returned to 4th after some time and moved back through the jhanic arc. Lay down and continued meditation moving through jhanic arc and noting at 4th then fell asleep. Woke up at 1.40 (feeling as if I had slept much longer) and noted breath and thoughts. Woke up at 6.00am and meditated till 7.00am through jhanas to 4th and noted there, finishing in 4th. Interesting point - Went to early dinner with my wife at Malaysian Restaurant nearby which was great however, noticed that hot curries (which I like) really mess with concentration in meditation. The evening sit and subsequent night was pretty agitated.

Busy day at work today so noting was limited to short times when emotions seemed high etc - good opportunity to question states of mind, motivations, reactions etc.

Generally things have settled to an almost boring level with the last week of meditations and experiences off cushions being as if I was not practicing at all. Interesting how it all goes - at this stage it seems as if no progress is being made at all. Everything the same - as they would say in manufacturing.....'boringly beautiful!' Is more intensity required? More momentum? and as Scotty would say 'I cannot give it much more captain!' Must continue nevertheless.

Reflection Note: I seem to be more able and interested in noting now for some reason and since it is a very practical and 'anytime' method with proven results, will adopt this in practice. So practice strategy now will return to original intention:

Meditation: Twice daily (more if possible on weekends/holidays) - Jhanas and noting and insight as appropriate
Noting: Through day where possible and with increasing frequency as skill increases.
Contemplation: As appropriate and when tired

Log Update 03/04/2013
Meditated last night sitting for 50 mins and lying down for 1 hour. Went through the jhanas spending longer in each one to maintain concentration and improve technique. Sitting with straighter back and neck is getting easier although irritating is the lower back clicks and slips as I relax - they can be quite distracting. Noting in 4th jhana and practicing moving between jhanas non-sequentially. No particular insight except watching, noting.

Woke up at 2.30 and noted breath, sensations and thoughts etc. fell asleep at about 3.30am then woke at 5.30 and noted breath for a few minutes than meditated through jhanas to 4th and noted sensations and thoughts from there.

Raining today so took bus and noted using iphone app continuously. I am finding that the concentrated state that this produces actually reduces thought streams so there is less to note - almost self defeating! So at this early stage of proficiency, I am focusing on noting body sensations, pleasant/unpleasant/neutral and sensate information. Noted continuously on bus home too at about 1 hz or less with a few blanks as well. I also noticed what Tom identified mentioned in his log - that the mind tends to label things before its had any evidence of the sensation. Interesting.

Right speech is still a struggle. This is strange because if I explore my real intentions - I would actually prefer not to talk to people unless absolutely necessary, especially at work but its like conditioned behaviour that compels me to get involved in pointless conversations that more often than not involve some negative or derisive element. Maybe its part of some deep-seated primate social behaviour that we have. I am becoming more painfully aware of it now and it feels more inappropriate than before so I guess there is progress but long way to go.